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KW_為何我開始體驗到平安,卻愈面臨經濟困境?
文章 專欄版編/發表於 2016 09/22, 22:55  
     

    問:
      自從我學了《奇蹟課程》,並開始操練寬恕,慢慢地也能體驗到內在的光明(聖靈)。只是,為何在我感覺內在的平安世界逐漸成型時, 卻也覺得日子更難過了?請問,我該如何找到上主的平安,同時能在世上活得如魚得水?我又該如何以聖靈的眼光看待世界,避開險惡的小我?我目前有一些財務上的難關,這類打擊過去不曾發生。

    答:
      剛接觸《奇蹟課程》的人,多半不知道自己正在打開一個窩藏了自己所有罪咎的陰暗地窖(T.31.V.6:6)。我們單純地以為自己只是跟隨教導愛與和平的內在導師,向祂學習如何在世間體驗更多的平安與愛而已。這個想法沒錯,但是,所謂學習體驗平安與愛的過程本身就是寬恕,而一開始我們都會誤解寬恕的意思(S.2.I.1)。我們一心以為,自己需要寬恕的是這輩子遇到的所有渾蛋,卻不知道原來全世界唯一需要寬恕的傢伙,就是我自己。

      事實上,我們感到不平安,是因選擇了認同小我那套罪咎懼以及匱乏的思想體系,和外境發生了什麼,一點關係也沒有。由於我們實在太害怕直接往內看了,《課程》便採用一種間接的方式,讓我們先往外看見小我投射出來的螢幕畫面(也就是看似在我們身外的世界)。那些外在問題是如此的逼真,但《課程》教我們認清,唯一的問題只出在我們的詮釋(M.17.4:2),只因我們內在深信自己罪大惡極,必遭天譴。

      有鑒於此,所有來到我們面前的功課,並非出自聖靈的策劃,而是我們心靈的決定。唯有在這些事件中深刻地覺察,我們才有機會療癒內在的罪疚,不再任它繼續躲在心靈地窖裡發黴、腐爛至無法辨認。所以說,無需設法避開小我和這類攻擊,而是要學習歡迎每個挑戰帶來的療癒機會。過程中,我們或許會遭遇一些變故,比如和某人的關係突然變得很緊張,或是在健康丶財務丶事業...出狀況等等。如今,我們總算能認出,這些是小我搞出來的花招了,它試圖阻擾我們作出其他選擇,要我們知難而退,回頭再把自己死死地釘在世界裡。無論如何,只要以聖靈為師,我們終會領悟,一切遭遇不過是我們練習自我寬恕的機會罷了,在某種程度上,它們可說是應我們之邀而來。

      因此,以你的狀況而言,不妨把眼前的財務難關視為一個轉機,藉此看清自己深藏內心的種種匱乏丶不足丶沒價值等信念。你若願意接受聖靈的眼光,便會慢慢對自己的困境有一種截然不同的詮釋。事實上,只要能放下罪咎,外境就僅僅是ㄧ個有待處理的單純事件而已,不會成為你自我定罪的工具。如此一來,不管外境改善與否,都不再影響你內在的平安了。這個轉化過程,說起來好像很簡單,但實際上,你可能發現自己對聖靈詮釋的強烈抗拒,特別是在一開始的時候。為此,耶穌才叮嚀我們,操練寬恕是需要時間的,這是一種過程。

    選自/奇蹟課程基金會問答服務
    翻譯/妍蓁
    校潤/紅雲、慧軍、一心、若水


    Q #756: I would like to know why the world of form gets so difficult to deal with when one starts to understand the concepts of A Course in Miracles , practice forgiveness, and get in contact with the Inner Light, the Holy Spirit. I've been going through difficult times in the outer material (non existing) world, while the inner, peaceful world manifests itself. What could I do to find the peace of God and still act in this world? How can we see this world with the eyes of the Holy Spirit, and avoid dealing with such a vicious ego and its attacks? In my case these attacks come in the form of economic difficulties that I've never gone through before.

    A: Most of us, when we first come to the Course, do not understand what we are opening the door to -- the locked vaults of sin and guilt in our own mind (T.31.V.6:6) ! We think we are simply asking to have a more peaceful and loving experience in the world by getting in touch with the Teacher of Love and peace within. At one level, that is true, but the process in coming to that experience of peace involves forgiveness, which none of us really understands in the beginning (S.2.I.1) . For we think we are going to learn how to forgive all the bastards in our life, not realizing that there is really only one bastard to forgive -- ourselves!

    The reason we are ever not at peace has nothing to do with our external life circumstances but only with the choice we have made to identify with the ego and its thought system of sin and guilt and fear and scarcity within. But for most of us, it is too fearful to look directly within and so the Course's process is an indirect one (T.14.I.4,5) -- we look at the projections of the ego from our mind out onto the screen we call the world, which seems to be outside us. As real as the external problems outside us may seem, the Course is leading us to a recognition that the problem is only our interpretation of those situations (M.17.4:2) , which is coming from our belief in our own sin and guilt, for which we believe we deserve punishment.

    And so the lessons begin -- not orchestrated by the Holy Spirit but brought by our own mind into our awareness so that the spots of guilt within can now be healed, rather than continuing to fester, hidden and unrecognized in the dark recesses of our own mind. The goal is not to avoid the ego and its attacks but rather to learn to welcome the opportunity for healing that each challenging situation offers us. And so a relationship may suddenly seem to become more difficult, or some shift in our life circumstances -- health, financial, career, etc., -- may seem to arise. Now, an initial interpretation of such challenges is that the ego is trying to sabotage us in our efforts to make a different choice, and certainly these problems can have the initial effect of riveting our attention even more in the world. But with the Holy Spirit as our Teacher we can begin to recognize that these are just the opportunities to practice forgiveness of ourselves that we have at some level invited in.

    In your own case, the new economic problems can be seen as opportunities to uncover your beliefs about yourself in terms of scarcity, lack and unworthiness. And as you can come to share the Holy Spirit's perception of yourself, you will begin to open up to a different interpretation of those financial challenges. As your own guilt is released, the external circumstances will merely be situations to be addressed, but not indictments of yourself.And so whether the external situation shifts or not will be irrelevant to your own peace of mind. Now this is the process, described very briefly, and you may find your resistance to accepting the Holy Spirit's interpretation strong, especially at the beginning. But that is why Jesus presents forgiveness in the Course as a process, requiring practice over time.



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